"News"

I think I mentioned in an earlier blog post something about the challenge of keeping up with the local news in Israel. I have taken to a morning ritual of scanning the NY Times, Ha-aretz, and Al-Jeezera-English sites…to get some semblance of balance.

But, for fun, I’ve also been collecting some of the more…um…memorable Ha-aretz articles. Here are some funny, sad, and sometimes frightening “News” headlines [click on the headlines for links to the original articles].

New campaign targets Jews 'abducted' by intermarriage

Yikes.

Brooklyn bike loan gets Hasids and Hipsters rollin' together

J

If it wasn't bad enough already

“The battered image of Hadassah, the American women's Zionist organization, may be harmed further by the disclosure earlier this month that its former chief financial officer was a mistress to Bernard Madoff - even as she sat on the committee that invested the charity's funds in Madoff's $50 billion Ponzi scheme.”

Oops.

U.S. Jews tell Catholics: We won't accept Christ as savior

No Shit.

The IDF sets its sights on saving the planet

Oh good, the IDF is going green…

Israel aims to colonize Hungary with Jews, says extreme right

“A well known extreme rightist Web site, www.hunhir.hu, is now saying that Israel and American Jews are planning to transport three million Jews with dual Israeli-U.S. citizenship into Hungary over the next two years. “

Really?

Swedish daily hits back at critics of IDF organ harvest story

“A Swedish newspaper provoked outrage in Israel … after it ran a story on transplant organ theft, a report an Israeli official branded anti-Semitic ‘hate porn.’”

What Netanyahu wants from Obama's 'self-hating Jews'

“Who is to blame for the latest dispute with the United States over the new neighborhood going up in Jerusalem's Sheikh Jarrah area? Mayor Nir Barkat? Certainly not. Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, who stood behind him? Ridiculous. Any child knows that everything is the fault of other Jews: Rahm Emanuel and David Axelrod, two American administration officials who are inciting President Barack Obama against their own people.”

I think this paragraph is meant sarcastically, but I’m not sure.

Israel tells El Al: Call it a separation fence, not a wall

“El Al passengers have received maps of Israel marking out a "separation wall" along the West Bank, but the Foreign Ministry has asked the airline to change the classification to "security fence," Haaretz has learned. New maps are to be distributed soon.”

Censorship, much?

Was Michael Jackson a friend of the Jews?

The crucial questions of our time….

Dutch journalist: Flu pandemics are Jewish conspiracy

Clearly not…see below:

Dozens of rabbis fly over Israel praying to defeat swine flu

“Dozens of rabbis and Kabbalah mystics armed with ceremonial trumpets took to the skies over Israel on Monday to battle the swine flu virus, according to local media reports.”

Soccer game or tear gas? Palestinians put controversial ad to test

“The row over a controversial advert for an Israeli mobile phone operator, which shows Israel Defense Forces soldiers playing soccer with Palestinians on both sides of the security barrier, continues…A video recently posted on YouTube has tried to reenact the game in reality, and found that the result could not be further removed from the situation on the ground: when the Palestinians kick the ball to the other side of the fence, what they get in return is a salvo of tear gas grenades.”

For the original add click here.

For the "reality," click here.